Question for the breeders

[GlennBaxterFamily]

I have been researching several breeds to try and find a fit for our family. I have joined several forums and none of them are as nice (can give advise or opinions without being a jerk about it) as here so I thought I would ask here.

I contacted a breeder. They asked me to send in a puppy application so I did. I even went a step further and sent her the link to my family blog which cover since 2009. I want there to be as much information exchanged as possible because I feel that is the best way to make a good match.

The breeder wrote me back and asked me a couple of questions, which I was happy to provide the information for but two things bothered me.

# 1
My BIL committed suicide by cop three months after returning from his third tour in Iraq. It was as horrific as you can imagine if not more. This happened in 2009. The breeder questioned my ability to raise a puppy because of this incident. I do not understand what one has to do with the other, any idea's?

#2
My cousin lives with me and is disabled. She is able to drive and take care of herself but lives with us for the added support. Yes she does have more doctor appointments than most but how does that apply to me? This breeder said "I am concerned about the health issues." I have 7 children (the youngest is 12) so we have the usual number of child accidents, scrapes and bruises but again how does that pertain to me raising a puppy? It would be different had they said I am concerned with the number of children you have .. but the health issues are not issues at all. In the last year we have had very few health issues other than my arthritis (which is not debilitating) my cousins doctor appointment and one son who is in a cast for a floating bone chip in his ankle.

Any thoughts?

[Pugs-R-MandyBait]

The breeder should have shown empathy - you have had loss, and you are a support system for your cousin, and are busy raising a passel of kiddos while improving your mind.
Neither point to me impacts how you would raise a pup. That said, I had a rescue come thisclose to denying me the adoption of a cat because my husband and I had put his 38yo gelding down six months before. It was time, he had a great life, he was fat and sassy when he went, it was just time. He had a cancer that we could no longer manage and surgery is NOT the option for a Senior Equine.
This may not be the breeder for you. All my dogs (four doxies and three big dogs) are adopted. Only one was semi-planned, and he chose me at a store I was working at. One was PetFinders, one was snatched from a guy threatening to toss her in the street, three are CraigsList, and one was rescued from the highway. Good dogs can just fall in your lap ... you should never have to defend your life to pay money for the privilege of a puppy.

[GlennBaxterFamily]

That is what is so confusing to me. Yes I am busy with kids but not so busy that I do not have time for a puppy. Yes I am in college full-time and the children are home-schooled BUT I do online college and the kids do online public school. We are home all day long!

I just don't get it at all! The thing about my BIL really, really bothers me, a LOT. I am not at fault for his actions first of all and secondly this happened 1 1/2 years ago! I am very sensitive to comments about my BIL. He spent 18 hours of the last 24 that he was alive with us. He left my house at 7:15 pm and my sister called to tell us about him being shot at 8:02 pm. I have heard many times, from many people why we did not stop him. My head knows there was nothing we could have done BUT sometimes my heart forgets that. Maybe I am being to sensitive to the breeders comments.

I understand breeders are picky about where they place their puppies and they should be but at least be HONEST about your reasons for not approving me rather than trying to come up with a reason that really isn't accurate!

PS
This was not a Pug breeder. The breeder suggested an older dog from a rescue for us rather than a puppy. No offense but I want a puppy!

[6 Beautiful Pugs]

It should not be the breeders business that your brother died. Period.

As far as health issues maybe they feel if there is a disabled person in the home that a pup might be too much for you to care for them and a pup....don't know.

When giving information, think of it like this - too little info is bad, but too much is bad as well. Give them the basics and then let them ask what they need to know. Don't volunteer your blog or anything else.

Take care,
Lisa

[GlennBaxterFamily]

"you should never have to defend your life to pay money for the privilege of a puppy"

This is going to be my mantra while trying to find our puppy!

[GlennBaxterFamily]

I did not tell her about my BIL dying or how he died. She found that information by searching my blog. I thought having access to my blog would give the breeder a "window" into our lives. I thought I was doing the right thing by being open and honest, lesson learned. I will not make that mistake again.

[shaynapug]

I guess we all have our "things"!

I don't understand how the death of a family member...no matter how they died would affect anything!

I have 2 "things" I don't like to sell puppies to people with young children...unless they are VERY experienced with dogs and training..... My reasoning for this is: Children can be hurt or scared by the nipping of puppies....Puppies might be hurt by a child reacting to a nibble....or other things. Mom's are often too busy watching young kids to be able to keep constant eye on a pup to properly house train. That said..there are always exceptions!

I also don't sell pups to people that have cats that aren't declawed....unless they're used to being around pugs!! I've had a very bad experience with my cousin's cat who "loved" their dog they had just lost! They begged me to leave my pug with them when I went away for the weekend. My girl almost lost her eye due to a scratch through the cornea!!!

[GlennBaxterFamily]

The thing is she knew how many kids I had and their ages, about Bo, my school and the kids school and told me to send in the puppy application. Makes no sense to me at all! Why tell me to send in the application?

[6 Beautiful Pugs]

it's obvious you are not too comfortable with them and they are not too comfortable with you, I would find a different breeder.

Take care,
Lisa

[pugaddiction]

Time to move on, not to worry, you will find that perfect puppy that you and your family are looking for.