So Many Problems,by Thalia of the Silver Screen

[tall grass pugs]

I really don't know what to do. Two days ago all of us scented the odor of a box of turkey thawing on the stove. Ceylon told me to work out a group plan to remove the turkey so all of us could share. Well, actually, we were promised that we could watch Ceylon eat the turkey. I had my choice of climbing a ladder or standing tip toe on John Ott to reach the box with my clever starfish paws. I forgot. And now we all received a tiny bite of cooked turkey on our kibble. I think the box is gone, and I am terrified to tell Ceylon. Perhaps some of the older pugs can help with advice. Ceylon had offered to let me sing back up on her new release, 'Fawn and Free,' but she may withdraw the offer over the turkey fiasco. I have to wake her up in half an hour, and my starfish paws are already shaking.

[ownedbymack]

Mack here,

I'm just a young pug, turning one year old in nine days, but could you find the freezer and get more turkey? I'm sure the staff has more hidden, if they are like mine, they buy in bulk. There is always more meat hidden in the ice cold freezer. If there is no turkey left, find some other meat and blame the mastiff for eating all the turkey. Good luck.


Mack

P.S. If the singing career doesn't work with Ceylon, you can sing backup on my debut CD "Born to be Wild."

[Nell's Mom]

Ceylon had offered to let me sing back up on her new release, 'Fawn and Free,'

You made me spit coffee on my computer I'll check with Nell and see if she has any advice. She's a sneaky little darlin'!

[Kim W.]

Thalia my dear, I don't know what to say. Here we try to blame things on the cats. Maybe tell her an intruder came in the middle of the night and took the box of turkey. You tried to awaken her, but she was getting her beauty rest and wouldn't budge.

[tocents]

Dear Thalia:

Rascal and I will be there shortly, bringing plenty of Jack Mack with which we will distract Miss Ceylon. If that does not work, I will just sprawl across her, pinning her down. (As I weigh about twice as much as she does, this should not be an issue) While she is trapped, you ,Rascal, P2, John Ott and the mastiff scour the house for more turkey. It's there-trust me. If not, take the Camry and find the nearest Walmart. I will also bring something called a credit card for your convenience.....


Sincerely,

Barney the Wonderpug.

[Newsie96]

Thalia, Murph-Man here. In light of the staff's recent escapades, I suggest you tell Ceylon that it was the kitchen staff's fault. Tell her you suspect they came in the middle of the night to feast while you were all slumbering. She knows they are cunning, I'm sure they'll buy it. Good luck. If you need refuge, hitch a ride on the mastiff and head for Connecticut. I'm sure Mommy won't mind hiding you out.

[tall grass pugs]

Oh what good ideas, blame someone else. That works. John Ott has sniffed out the box in the trash, and with just a little mess, we have dragged the box to Ceylon's queen sized bed in the staff's bedroom. Believing the bigger the lie, the better the chance, we have decided to tell Ceylon that she was sleep walking and ate the turkey all up herself, at around four this morning. With some difficulty, I have also induced the wild and feral cat creatures to lick the box and now they have turkey breath. I really miss the nice people in Texas at my rescue. Things were easier there. Thalia of the Silver Screen

[pegatha]

Poor Thalia! All this conspiring must tire you out - you need a nap, dear girl. Peg

[Kim W.]

Thalia, you are learning. The use of feral cats is pure genius!! We bow to you in your wisdom.

[Pugsaunt]

Thalia, when food is involved, it is always safe to incriminate the cats. Sam just will not stay out of my food, so he gets blamed for anything involving food. By the way, what is turkey? It sounds yummy.

Penny Lane