To let them cry it out, or to not let them cry it out?

[ItsyBitsy]

I have a mesh kennel for Meimei and she does not like it one bit. I had gotten Meimei from the AZ humane society so we had spent a week there, and she slept in the living room in a baby pen with little issues other than a bit of crying and being woken up a couple of times during the night. Standard stuff. I had tried the same thing at the place in Canada and she lost it. It's a new place so I put her on the end of my bed in her kennel. She screamed, cried, bit at the walls, and flopped around like a fish; a bigger tantrum than a human child. I had tried comforting her outside of the kennel but she was overstimulated and biting at everything she could and HARD, not aggressively just the puppy teathing/playing so I let her cry it out in the kennel on the end of my bed. Her cries were so loud my brother who lives in the basement came to check on her at 3 am. We had a similar situation tonight but not as extreme. Googling whether you should let them cry it out just makes it worse since every site basically contradicts the other. Not to mention I am WEAK to her cries and I HATE hearing her cry for me (plus how can anyone resist a sad pug face?)

The TLDR (to long don't read version)
What is the best way to handle puppy sadness in the kennel at night that is the best for the dog emotionally in the long run? IMG_4665.jpg

[CSollers]

As soon as she learned to let us know that she needed to go outside, Minni slept in the big bed. You just have to get up and take her out when she stirs. You may want to feed her in the kennel so she sees it as a good place.


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[Suri]

I got my pup during covid shutdown she slept in my bed day 1, I got up during the night and took her out whenever she woke. Never an accident and the first night she let out a scream but I pet her and after a couple of weeks I just took her out once during the night. I have read on a training site if you can crate them right near you so when they cry you are to put your fingers
In the crate to comfort the pup. They mentioned sleeping in the living room or where ever the crate is.


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[Lu Ci and Ri Ki]

Pugs are bred to be companions and that's mostly what they want (well, besides food). They just want to be with us. I agree with putting her crate near your side of the bed so you can reach down and comfort her and let her know you are right there.

[Wonka & Nilla]

I was also going to suggest putting the crate right next to where you sleep so you can dangle your fingers inside. For us that really helped a lot when our pugs were new to the home. If you are comfortable with having her on the bed then that's probably what SHE would prefer, but not everyone wants a dog on the bed and I totally understand that. Next best thing is to help her understand that the crate is a happy and comforting place. Make it a place she doesn't mind going to... give her a special toy at night to suckle on (if she likes that) or give her a special treat that will take a while for her to eat and she only gets it when she goes into the crate. Make the experience as positive and soothing as possible.

And as far as letting her cry it out... that's tough! It's hard to hear them cry and to resist comforting them. Keep in mind that when you "give in" you are teaching her a lesson that if she cries long enough and hard enough, then the human will come and comfort her. By "giving in" at 30 minutes or an hour or whatever, that might cause her to get even more wild with her tantrums if you try to resist on a different night - because "it worked before, so I must just need to cry even harder!" Pugs are so smart and they really just want to be with their humans. Ideally you can keep her close enough that you can reach down and pet her through the crate, let her sniff your fingers, talk to her, but don't take her out. Hopefully she'll learn that you are right there by her and it's okay.

Another option, if you don't want her on the bed and a crate is just causing both of you misery, would be a "co-sleeper" type of bed. These are like a crib or an elevated bed and they sit right next to your bed. The dog is right there next to you, but not actually on your bed. We used this for our boy Wonka in the last few years of his life and it really worked well for us. He was happy to be right there by us and I was able to sleep without the "little pug-furnace" crowding me, kicking me and putting out a thousand degrees of heat! I don't know how that little body could put out so much heat! Normally Wonka would be on the bed with me for an hour or two and then when hubby came to bed later he would move Wonka to the "crib." When Wonka was younger - and when we had two pugs - Wonka would be on the bed for a while and then hubby moved him to an x-pen at the foot of the bed. Our other pug, Nilla, usually stayed up late with hubby and so she went right into the x-pen when he came to bed.

I hope you find a solution that works for you and Meimei so that everyone can get some sleep.

[GordonBrunoPugMom]

You have to decided where you want your pup to be. Gordon was sleeping in the kitchen with Dachshund and later with Bruno until we moved to a new house and my husband decided to have the boys with us at night. Henry started in a soft kennel/bed next to my bed and now sleep with us. Bruno actually some days decided to go back to dog bed.

Every situation is different and dogs have different temperaments and personalities . You will figure out what works best for you , you family and dog.

My Henry is kinda little and I always worry he falls of the bed so he has to be in the middle fo the bed .


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[ItsyBitsy]

Thank you! I will look at co-sleeper types of beds for when she is this little to avoid her falling off the bed or me squishing her in my sleep. (plus they look so stinking cute haha)

[LilyFayre]

Hi - I just wanted to reiterate that when mine cried in the night it was because they needed a bathroom trip and went straight back to sleep in their cat carrier beside me on the bed after they’d relieved themselves. Mine both slept in the carrier until they were big enough to safely get up and down off the bed

Good luck!