Help! I'm being stalked by Maude

[Blanche]

The boy!! Oh my goodness, the boy! The wellspring of all things good and wonderful. The hook upon which hangs my happiness. The keeper of the good pillows. I must save the boy.

The staff is stomping around the kitchen grumbling about People making cracks about her tired oranges. She threw them all into the stinky can where all the good things go. I don't know what it means, but I'm pretty sure she is now the host for the leash snake babies. I am glad I won't be ont he bed with her when the leash snakes hatch and come boiling out of her. Poor Hazel. She's a goner.

I'm emailing Dr. Tom, too. I'm pretty sure he doesn't want me walking with leash snakes.

[Melissa]

Just wanted to say:
THIS is why I love PugVillage!

[TxAllieGrl]

Dear Maude,

Please let me know when you find a solution. I have a similar stalker, although mine is red and black. I hate it!

Bello

[tall grass pugs]

Taco, here. I have googled the secret of the leash snake, fortunately I read Russian fluently and have viewed Taras Bulba. Remembering the verse we copied in school, 'an aging prince of Europe takes his weapons from the wall,' I stand and call upon the Hetman of the Free Brotherhood of the Zaparozne Pugs to take their swords in their paws and put their swords in the leash snakes. Death to leash snakes.

[tocents]

Dearest Maudie:

Chatty Liza here and have no fear. The orange orbs are your friends-in time, they will magically morph into a magical substance known as Orange Pine Sol. As this is a liquid substance, the snakes will drown and your troubles will be over.

Always glad to help...

Sincerely,

Liza Jane

[Georgia]

Dear Maude,

Please let me know when you find a solution. I have a similar stalker, although mine is red and black. I hate it!

Bello

We have these in Australia, and they're called Red Bellied Black Leashsnakes. They're territorial and kill others found in their territory, so really they're quite useful to have around - I saw one crossing our road just the other day!!!

[PinkLotus]

I love PV!

[sfgiants]

Maude,

I believe that the Leash Snakes are sucking the life force from the oranges and somehow converting it to..... Orange PineSol, which we all know is the most powerful substance on the planet, and completely capable of turning your mom into a raving lunatic (trust me, we here at PV have seen it happen).

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

[1pugmom]

Mickey the non pug here. (see avatar) Here is what I do with those darn things and it drives mom and dad crazy and really kills them. Now I realize your teeth may not be in the best of health so you may need to get help but when daddy is walking me and stops to talk to someone or is not looking I reach around and chew the little piece that holds the hook on! It really really works. And I have got so good at it I can do it in about 10 seconds. Mom and dad have had to tied it back together, sew it back together or if I get it in the right place it rolls back up into its home and is gone forever!!! I hope this helps alll my little buddies out there in PV land. But remember if you do get free don't go to far. Just far enough to give you mommy or daddy a good jolt to their heart, Mickey out:::::

[Snifter]

Snifter here.

I used to be plagued by a blue leash snake when I was a puppy. It was a vicious terrible thing. But one day, when we were out in the park, it bit Daddy in the hand and he dropped it. I ran as fast as I could with the leash snake crashing behind me, coming closer, closer, closer....Mummy was chasing me calling out to a group of small girls to save me from the terrible blue leash snake. The small girls gathered me up and petted me until my Mummy caught up.

From that day forth the leash snake has not been seen. Maybe if you can persuade your leash snakes to bite your mummy you might have the same result.

Good luck.