My pug bit my son - what do I do?

[Oscar the Pug]

I'm at a bit of a loss and need to ask advice from responsible and loving pug owners and parents. I have been a member of this forum for quite some time and value the advice that I have read here over the years. I'm not much of a poster, but I have a situation.

I have a 3 year old pug named Oscar. He is sweet, affectionate, stubborn and funny. We got him when my son was 18 months old. They grew up together and are great friends. In the past year, my son has been diagnosed with autism. He is sweet and loving as well, but is becoming difficult to manage, especially around Oscar. He doesn't understand that pinching him when he wants to hug him hurts Oscar, so now we keep them more or less separated. The other night Oscar was in his crate and I was in the restroom. My son opened his crate and stole his blankey, which made Oscar angry. He jumped up and bit him on the face and broke the skin with his bite.

Now I feel like I have to give Oscar away because my son just can't be trusted, even for a second with the dog. It's not the dog's fault - he's a good dog. So my question is this - do I invest $1200 for a trainer to come to my house to work with us - keeping in mind that my son has comprehension issues - or do I have to give him up? If I do, I would like some referrals to good pug rescues, etc. because he doesn't deserve to go to a shelter. My heart is breaking as I type this as we all love little O, but I have to be a responsible parent and dog mommy and do what's best for everyone.

Thanks everyone.

[PrincessMugs7]

I honestly don't know what to tell you here. How old is your son? Do you think you can talk to his teachers if he goes to school about how to teach boundries and what is right and wrong. I am terribly sorry that this has happened but I think with all the love and knowledge on here we should be able to come up with a way to keep all the pet and children and have them live together. I know sometimes special needs children can learn a lot from having a pet.

I am mainly responding to tell you that you are in my thoughts and prayers. It takes a special person to have a pug, and an even more special and amazing person to raise a child with special needs...and to immediately feel the way you did about giving up the pug just shows your strength as a parent and love for your children of the fur and skin kind. Bless you and your home *and all that play there* I hope everything works out for the best!

[shaynapug]

I'm so sorry that you're going through this! Working with....and living with a very autistic child is NOT in the least bit easy!

I often sub in the Asberger (sp) room...which is for the higher functioning autisic child. I also sub in another special ed room that often has autistic children in it. And...I taught hearing impaired children, often with other disabilities, for 34 yrs.

Here's my feeling on it. Are you getting help with your son at this time? If so, what do his teachers feel about this? At this time, I feel that you'd be wasting your money to hire a trainer....as it is not Oscar that needs the training.

Not knowing your son, it's difficult to say what is best for him, for you, and for Oscar.

If your son cannot understand the proper way to treat Oscar...and you cannot trust him with him.....It's got to be awfully hard on you as you cannot watch them both 24/7......(I've had parents that had to take their preschooler into the bathroom with them because they couldn't be trusted with no one watching!) It's HARD!!! Nearly impossible...and a lot of strain on you and your son!

If it were me, I'd proably cry my eyes out...and make the best decision for everyone...including Oscar.....and I would look into placing him in a loving home where he won't be at risk of being hurt...or hurting someone having to protect himself.

Hopefully, there will be a time down the road, when your son will be able to understand how to act around animals....and it might be a good thing for him to have a dog at that time.

Again....I'm so sorry that you're facing such a difficult decision. I have a lot of respect for you that you are thinking of both your son and Oscar in such a loving way!

I'm seeing you continuing to make the right decisions for all involved.....And being a strong advocate for your son during his years in school.

[Oscar the Pug]

Thanks ... my son is receiving speech, ABA and OT therapies. His case is considered mild (for lack of a better word). With early intervention and the right therapies, his teachers believe that he'll be in regular classes by grade 1/2. He's in the last year of preschool right now and goes to a special ed class. I was going to call his therapist first thing on Monday to get her advice. For the most part my son is good with Oscar but he's so little and vulnerable, but on the other hand if his bite was one inch higher it would have been on the eye.

If we do decide to give Oscar away, how should we go about it? I don't really want to give the dog away to a stranger nor a shelter as he deserves to be in a loving home where there are older kids. Are there good pug adoption organizations I can contact?

[SairaLV]

Thanks ... my son is receiving speech, ABA and OT therapies. His case is considered mild (for lack of a better word). With early intervention and the right therapies, his teachers believe that he'll be in regular classes by grade 1/2. He's in the last year of preschool right now and goes to a special ed class. I was going to call his therapist first thing on Monday to get her advice. For the most part my son is good with Oscar but he's so little and vulnerable, but on the other hand if his bite was one inch higher it would have been on the eye.

If we do decide to give Oscar away, how should we go about it? I don't really want to give the dog away to a stranger nor a shelter as he deserves to be in a loving home where there are older kids. Are there good pug adoption organizations I can contact?

I cannot recommend rescue enough. I know we (as do other rescues) do vet checks, housechecks, and have an application process, and we try to match the pug to the best home possible.

I am not sure where in CA you are, but there are some good rescues in the state. Here is a list of some in CA, and I know there are members here that have worked with some, and are involved in some as well.

Little Angels Pug Rescue (LA)

Pugs 'N Pals of Southern California

Pug Rescue of Sacramento, California

Pug Rescue of San Diego

PugSavers - Northern California

I am sorry you have to go through this, but it does sound as if you are doing what is best for all involved.

[shaynapug]

If you do decide that placing Oscar with another family is the best way to go for all at this time, I agree that rescue is the way to go! They check out their future homes very thoroughly!

Our motto is......While we do look for the right dog for the person that wants to adopt......We may not take the next person in line to adopt for that particular dog. Our goal is to meet our PUG's needs first and look for the exact right home for that pug. I'm sure most if not all rescues operate this way.

Sending you a big as this decision is not going to be an easy one to make...no matter what you decide.

[genevieveD]

what an awful situation , I'm sorry you have to go thru such a thing.

There is a Pug Rescue Up in Santa Barbara that you could try to contact if you decide to go that route.They are very selective as to who their dogs go to.

http://www.pugrescuesb.com/

[Rosiepug]

You've had great advice.
I just want to send you this hug because you're are in a heartbreaking situation.

[Almandine]

I think you are very brave for looking at the situation head on. It is so easy to bury you head over these things. I am so sorry this has happened for you.

If it were me, I think I'd have to personally know where he was going and be able to keep in touch. But I also know there are some wonderful and dedicated rescue folks out there who do a wonderful job.

At the end of the day, you know your son and you know your pug, probably better than anyone else does. Would your son be able to cope with never touching the puggy blanket/toys/food?

When I was about 12 years old, my baby brother (who has aspergers sydrome) crawled up to Mum's pekingese's dinner bowl while he was eating. This peke had never bitten anyone, ever before, but he bit my brother on the forehead. He had a little scar for years. But it never happened again.

I would support whatever decision you make and I'm sorry that you are in this position.

We're thinking of you.

[1pugmom]

I also work with handicapped children several who are autistic. If he is as high functioning as you think he may be worked with. My questions would be is this the first time? Does he understand the reprecussions? Is he forgiving? If you have seen your son not be gentle with Oscar previously then it may be time to reconsider having him and rescue is the ONLY way to go. ON a side note I have a 6yr old autistic student with a pug and they do well together.